May You Choose Your Best Life

Living. Thriving. Enjoying your existence. These are so much more exciting than simply being alive. In addition, there is nothing like finding purpose and peace. It is more powerful than any difficulty that you or I could ever face. It’s not enough that we inhale and exhale. It’s not enough to be conscious. It’s more important to be present and aware of who we are, our thoughts, feelings and reactions. Choosing to get or stay connected with ourselves and understand our identity is crucial. Few things matter more.

For the month of May, I wish you 3 particular things: May you survive; may you cry things all out; and may you take charge of your life.



May You Survive:

I talk a lot about living your best life and learning to thrive. However, there are times when we have to go back to the basics: survival. Life can hit us so hard that we fall to our knees and some kind of way end up on our back. Before we can gather the strength to use our pain to propel us forward (thrive), we have to figure out a way to get up and get our mind right. I haven’t forgotten the baby steps of getting up. Life has been reminding me of them a lot lately. I haven’t felt super strong. Discouragement has been breathing down my neck. I’m being stretched and life is demanding that I grow quickly. It’s tough. I have had to rest in God and use the tricks and tips He’s taught me to keep me from sinking. I have to consistently decide what is important and why. These two questions always make my path more clear and offer me so much stability. They help me decide what needs my immediate attention and what can go in the pile of “get to later”. I encourage you to do the same.

May You Cry Things All Out:

Personally, I’m tired of crying. I feel like I have spent most of this year in tears. This has been a season of sadness for me. Although I don’t always shed physical tears, my heart  has cried so much.

The secret to being inspired and experiencing life change is taking the time to cry. We have to take the time to grieve and allow our hearts and our spirits to feel emotions and process pain. By nature, I’m not an extremely strong person. When I was younger, I would utilize fake strength. I tried to turn off my emotions and cover up the pain, pretending that it didn’t exist. The results were chaos and utter catastrophe. I wouldn’t let myself cry. I wouldn’t let myself be who I needed to be in my low moments. I would pretend to be in a place of strength instead of learning to possess strength. I discuss this further in my book, MsMissy Speaks. It’s been quite a process; but I eventually learned how to embrace my emotions without allowing them to define or confine me.

Experiencing pain is not a bad thing. This is something that I have to remember right now in my difficult season. Ignoring pain and becoming bitter is when we run into major problems. So, cry. Let it all out. Don’t fake strength and hold in the tears. For some, crying might be in the form of journaling or blogging or telling someone what you’re going through. It may not be physical tears but there must be an outlet. There must be a release.

May You Take Charge:

It’s my hope that you realize that you have power. Life happens and difficulties come at what seem like the most inopportune times. However, I hope you know that you are capable of exploring options and creating positive solutions. You may do so on your own and then other times, you may need help.

Perhaps, like me, you feel that you have to have solutions. And, like me, you have probably realized that they aren’t always readily available. I’d like to make a suggestion: you can always control your attitude (perception and response) and what you accept as definite truth.

I suggest that you fight for peace of mind and positivity. I know that these words are not always easy to put into action. When in crisis, my first reaction is to panic, complain or run away. But I always feel stronger (in the end) when I fight to be in charge of me and my mood. It’s like I get to stare life in the face and say, ‘Ha!’

No matter your circumstances, may you know that you are not alone. May you keep taking steps forward, focusing on what’s best for you. I hope that you won’t hesitate to reach out for support. I’m here and I’m willing to be a help along your journey.


Hope Always,




My book, MsMissy Speaks, is available for purchase on my website and at the APS Books and More bookstore in Chicago.


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Heyyy!! My name is Melissa. I'm affectionately called Missy. I'm a survivor who has learned to thrive! As one who has overcome depression, suicide, abuse and physical illness, I know that hope is real. Everything that I've been through has been for my good. My struggle helped me to more clearly see me and discover hope, happiness, and purpose.

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