This Warrior Is a Child
I’ve been feeling like I lost my mojo. I’m emotionally and mentally tired. I’ve spent a lot of time this year in grief and in anger. I’ve been grieving the loss of close relationships and angry with myself for recent relationship mistakes I’ve made. I’ve been in a season of isolation as well. Frankly, I feel tired of pouring into the lives of many who never pour back into me. I’ve been the motivator who has often felt unmotivated.
Now that I’ve admitted my truth please allow me to move forward.
I’m honored to be the Founder of Moments with Missy™. I’m honored that I get to share my hurts but more importantly my healing. I’m honored that I get to tell my story of being restored from a level of brokenness and bitterness that are far too deep to explain with words. I’m honored that I get to be human and experience the human struggle as well as the many blessings life gifts us. I’m honored that I feel just like everyone else and I’ve learned how to acknowledge those feelings and keep moving forward. I’m blessed to realize that I am not my pain. I am not what has happened to me. I am not my disappointment. I not my mistakes. I am MsMissy the warrior. I am MsMissy the conqueror. I am no longer a victim. I fight and I SURVIVE.
Maybe like me, you’ve been pushing uphill for a long time. Maybe you feel lost and uncertain. Maybe your inspiration is at a low right now. I’d like to remind you that these things are tied to emotions and fatigue. When you’ve been fighting a war against mediocrity, a painful past, depression, anxiety, abuse, trauma, addiction, health challenges, and any other type of hell, you get tired. It’s natural. It’s going to happen and there’s no way around it. I continue to learn that it’s so important to reach out for help. It’s so important to not suffer in silence. There’s a song I learned as a child that as an adult I understand so much more. I hope it blesses you. Click the link below if you’d like to listen to it.
🎶🎶🎶 The Warrior Is a Child 🎶🎶🎶
I’m fighting a war against fatigue like never before. Thankfully, I’m not fighting alone. I’d like to leave you with some tips that are helping me.
(1) Be honest: If you lie to yourself and if you lie to others you’ve already lost the fight. You’re not fighting the right battle when you’re not facing and owning the truth. It’s okay to get tired. It’s okay to be frustrated. It’s okay to not feel like fighting whatever demons or ailments that are challenging you. It’s okay to take some time to be refreshed and revived, especially, if like me, your main job or ministry is to pour into others. You have to start with being honest about where you are so that you can get to where you want to be.
(2) Ask for help: Tell someone about your struggle. There are few things as freeing as sharing your load with someone else. Your big top secret loses its hold on you. And what’s even more amazing is that more times than not someone is going through the exact same thing. When I started verbalizing my struggle with depression and started telling people about the extreme emotional pain and trauma I experience regularly, I began to feel and BE so powerful. When I tell people about my pain, I start to feel less trapped. The issues don’t completely go away but the hold they have on me loosens. It’s hard to be bullied by something or someone when everyone knows about it and is watching.
(3) Take Care of Yourself: Make time to take care of you. Make sure that your well-being is your priority. When you are fighting struggles, pain and bitterness and are not properly restoring the balance of your “hope jar” you will become depleted. I’m speaking from experience. I answered the call to be an advocate and to be a voice for people who felt they had no voice. Looking back, I realize that I had no idea what I was really agreeing to do. However, I do not regret the life I live but I definitely have had to make some changes. I can’t take on everyone else’s pain and continue to open up my heart and share all of my pain and trauma without restoring hope, peace and quiet within myself. I’ve made changes financially. I spend less money on others and more of it on me. I’ve learned to not be afraid of the cost of treating myself to a spa day. I’m worth it! I’ve even lost weight (and inches) and have been making better food choices. Some calls I allow to go to voicemail. I no longer feel I have to answer every text immediately. If I’m tired, I rest. If I don’t feel that I’m in a good space emotionally, then I don’t run to be anyone else’s advocate or strength until I have properly been my own. I have had to learn this the hard way. I have poured and poured and poured into people and I’ve gotten little to nothing in return. I have no one but myself to blame yet I’m upset. However, in good ole MsMissy fashion, I have learned a lesson. That matters most.
My wish for you is that September would be a better month than August and that it leads to more insight, courage, determination and wellness for October. If I can ever be of help, please don’t hesitate to reach out to me. I promise that I will answer. 😉
Hope Always and Comitted,
My book, MsMissy Speaks, is available for purchase on my website and at the APS Books and More bookstore in Chicago.